


Howling

by Swoff82



Category: Sicario (Movies)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Gen, Redemption
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-27
Updated: 2020-01-09
Packaged: 2020-03-20 06:27:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18987118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Swoff82/pseuds/Swoff82
Summary: Kate receives news.





	1. Telephones are the Harbingers of News

‘Hot night coming  
Keep the car running  
Lavender fingers  
Swallow my pollen’  
\- Cathedrals, ‘Howling’

 

1.

The TV flickered brightly in the dark room, beside a dim lamp being the other source of light in the otherwise dark room. An empty bottle rested on the coffee table, the remote and Kate’s feet accompanying it. She watched the screen, seeing but not comprehending what the TV was trying to sell her. The night was warm and dark, and it suited her current mood, a little groggy from the bottle and the dull evening programming. 

It was Friday night, the only night she allowed herself a bottle of something. Drinking had been a crutch since the apartment and the balcony. It became a habit rather than a problem, and after a while she didn’t need something every evening to sleep. But she knew to keep it at bay, and everything in moderation right? 

The phone rang, shaking the grogginess out of her. Getting up and moving to the sideboard she picked it up, she got few calls, and even less on a Friday night.

“Hello?” she spoke into the handset noticing the caller ID was blocked.

“Macer,” the voice came back and she stood upright recognizing the voice. The slight mocking tone could only come from one person.

“What do you want, Matt?” Kate shot down the phone.

“Well, nice to hear from you too Kate. How ya been?” his tone mocking and teasing sent fury down her spine. 

“Uninterested in ever speaking to you again is how I’ve been,” Kate retorted “What do you want?”

“I have news,” he replied, suddenly sounding serious almost somber.

Kate stilled, and knew what he was going to tell her. 

“Alejandro was killed yesterday in Mexico. Executed by a trafficking gang”.

Kate sat heavily in a dining chair, blood had rushed to her head, pumping in her ears. She felt sick. And then she felt sick at feeling sick.

“Macer?” Matt sounded far away, muffled. She could barely hear him over the blood in her ears.

“Why are you telling me this?” Kate asked quietly. 

Matt was silent, she knew he was hesitating, “I thought you should know. That it might help, or not, I don’t know really. I just thought you’d want to know”.

He sounded deflated, Kate realized. She didn’t know until now that Matt cared for him. Alejandro had once said they were friends, but only now that seemed true.

“I don’t think it ended well between you two,” Matt surmised quietly and Kate couldn’t even bring herself to scoff. “I know he did things, we were in a position, and…” he trailed off.

Kate finally rallied and she was clipped in her question, “How do you know he’s dead?”

“We had surveillance on him,” Matt responded, “An operation he was assisting with went sideways…went bad. And I was under orders.”

“Orders to take him out?” Kate was deadpan, “You have a boss?” 

Matt was silent and then, “Yes and yes we all have a boss. But you talk and this conversation never happened.”

At that Kate did scoff and yelled down the phone at him, “I can’t talk about anything! Not after what I signed!”

“I know that. I didn’t mean that you would talk”, Matt reasoned.

“I,” he hesitated, "The gang saved me the job.”

“And you didn’t save him from that?” Kate didn’t know why that mattered, but it seemed to.

“No. I let it happen”, he sounded small and she knew it was hard for him to tell her he left his friend to the wolves, “It had to be done and I couldn’t do it.”

“It wasn’t messy,” he told her, “A bullet to the head.”

She felt her knees go at that even though she was seated. A bullet to the head seemed tangible, factual. 

“He’s dead then,” she stated aloud.

Matt was silent. She realized he was struggling.

“I’m sorry, Macer.”

“You’re sorry?” she almost spluttered, “Why are you apologizing to me?”

He was quiet again, “Because there’s no one else I can apologize to”.

He hung up at that, nothing left to be said, and the dial tone filled Kate’s ear and the room.


	2. A Brief History til Now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kate looks back.

‘God, I fell into your spell  
On the rite of god we fell  
You would flash an eyelid babe  
You had me howling’  
Cathedrals, ‘Howling’

2.

Kate had taken Alejandro’s advice. 

She moved to a small town. Though Fort Hancock wasn’t as far away as she assumes Alejandro meant. It was barely south-east of El Paso, and too close to the border. 

She joined the local law, also probably not what he meant for her. The Sheriff was pleased or relieved to have someone with her experience on the Fort Hancock force. Her skills were wasted but that didn’t matter, it was a way to while the time.

The town was quiet, but since the rise of the cartels and human trafficking the town was on edge. The drugs weren’t crossing into the States in Fort Hancock but people were. Migrants were known to perish in the desert near the town, the heat disorientating and unforgiving. Sad ends to sad tales. Kate was called out to a number of these. Mostly the victims don’t carry ID so they can’t be taken back to the families they left trying to save. 

The town was also poor, but people didn’t need much to get by in the town so there wasn’t much trouble associated with the relative poverty. Kate, her needs very few now, could get by on the smell of an oily rag though she made decent money relatively speaking in her role for the town. She was saving. 

She rented a small two bedroom house. It was white with a red roof and picket fence. It would be quaint in other states but here it appeared tired, beaten down by the sun and the desert sands dusting the fence and house exterior. Other houses were built of plaster and practical colors. The house she rented was out of place, like she was.

After signing the affidavit in her apartment it hadn’t taken long to realize she needed to leave. Her integrity was in tatters, placing her life above what had happened in the tunnel and after. She was responsible and complicit, like they were, and she could not carry on at the FBI as if nothing had happened. She could protect herself but couldn’t go back to before.

So she resigned after a few weeks of self-imposed leave following Alejandro’s last visit. It was now two years since her life in Phoenix, since it was all turned upside down and inside out.

The thing about it all now was that she didn’t blame them. Didn’t blame Matt for recruiting her on the task force. Didn’t blame Jennings for not telling her what was really going on. Didn’t blame Reggie for introducing her to Ted. And she didn’t blame Alejandro. 

She blamed herself for not seeing what was going on until it was all too late. Because she knew when he asked on the plane if she’d been to Juarez that this wasn’t what it was supposed to be. She knew when the soldiers in that meeting looked like mercenaries. She knew that Matt was a spook. And she knew that Alejandro was something else entirely.

She knew and yet she didn’t, because she carried on like she had some semblance of control when all she was, was a small cog in the wheel that Matt and Alejandro were spinning.

That self-blame followed her to Fort Hancock and weighed her down since, unable to forgive herself for knowing and following because she wanted to follow. Because of the bodies in that house, the agents they lost in the explosion, the lack of any damn progress on cartel kidnappings, the bodies hanging from that bridge, the migrants sitting in the dirt to board buses back to hopelessness and because of Alejandro. Mostly because of Alejandro.

After what happened in her apartment she expected to have nightmares of him. She thought she would see him in the dark corners of her life which seemed to be growing. She thought she would wake up feeling the cool metal against her chin. Feel his hand brush her face. Hear him say her name. She could never quite place the way he said her name. There was something to it, but it created a feeling in her that was something she couldn’t describe in words.

When she didn’t have nightmares as expected she considered over and over why this was. Because she had been scared when he appeared in her small apartment. She wasn’t sure if it was because he was able to enter seemingly like a ghost or because she knew why he was there. In hindsight she thinks it was the former because even now she doesn’t think he was there to kill her. She knows logically he was doing what he had to do. And she reasons that if he wanted to kill her he would have. 

They didn’t need to offer that letter to her to sign. They could have wiped her off the face of the earth and that would have been easier for them, no loose ends at all. Reggie would have put up a fuss but they could have handled him. 

That has kept her awake more than what actually happened at the apartment, but not more than Ted.

Ted has been the nightmare, not Alejandro. She wakes up at night clawing to free the hands wrapped around her neck. Has woken up drenched from nightmare induced sweat. More often than it being Ted that appears its Alejandro looming above her or feeling his presence but not being able to see him. Those ones aren’t nightmares but they are still a reminder of what and how it happened. 

Was she just bait for them? Did Matt tell her not to go into the bank to make her do the opposite? She knows she was going in there anyway but did Matt know that? And did Alejandro know, which seemed more important. She thinks if he knew he wouldn’t have let it get as far as it did. Wouldn’t have let her almost have sex with a corrupt cop cartel affiliate who was probably going to kill her to get to what she knew or Matt or Alejandro. 

She’d never felt more vulnerable than standing in the bathroom thanking Alejandro for saving her life. She knew he sensed this as he brushed it off like it was nothing and she didn’t think that was guilt, or at least not all guilt on his part. And she also didn’t think it was nothing to him. Though she knows that almost all of this was a specific undertaking for him. 

She’d had nightmares about Alejandro’s wife and daughter. Yet she had never seen a picture of either. She couldn’t identify how she felt about what had happened to them and what she thought of Alejandro because of it. You could never understand the depth of feelings related to such an act of violence. To an act of that level of inhumanity. She thought it would make someone either want to kill or to die. That it was something so horrifying that they were the only ways to move forward.

From the way Alejandro turned to her when she was aiming at him from the balcony she thinks he wanted both. Telling her that she reminded him of the daughter they took from him adding weight to that idea her in mind. He couldn’t save his daughter, but the women he met that reminded him of her could kill him as punishment or release.

She also thought it was possible he was taunting her when he turned to her, knowing she wouldn’t follow through. He had told her never to point a gun at him again, and didn’t punish her then for doing so and not following through. But she didn’t need to be punished by him, she would alone do that for the rest of her life.

Kate thought about Alejandro every day with or without the nightmares and dreams. She knew she shouldn’t, that any person would think she was a masochist, was obsessed or had certain types of ‘issues’ with men. Probably all of that was true. And there was a part of Kate that hated him, because she had felt weak after the apartment. But that was because he exposed that weakness in her, had tested her integrity and found her lacking. 

Then there was the part of her that felt something else for him. The part that contributes to her self-punishment. The part that made her feel sick at feeling sick on hearing the news. She had never been able to reconcile her feelings for Alejandro. She just knew simultaneous guilt and need. And now that would be all she felt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the kind comments and kudos. I shall continue! And an FYI I'm not American so I may get some things wrong...


	3. Stranger in a Bar

‘Caught, I swam into your skin  
On a night you let me under your sin  
You had me howling  
You had me howling’  
\- Cathedrals, ‘Howling’

3.

One year later

Fort Hancock had one bar, as far as he could tell, and it catered for all. Cowboys, dive bar seekers, jukebox fans, drunks and cops. They all tolerated each other so long as their goal of a cold answer to the relentless heat was met.

He sat in a booth down the back of the bar, facing towards the bar but inconspicuous due to the sun streaming in the front half of the bar and shadowing the rear area. The Last Stand the bar was called and it suited it. It seemed like the sort of place someone would want to have their last drink.

He was nursing a beer, not a good beer, but it was cold. 

It was 4pm on a Friday, and people were trickling into the bar to celebrate making it through another work week. 

He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been in a bar like this at a normal hour, with people who have normal lives. People that go to work, mow their lawns, take their kids to soccer practice. He supposed there was a time when he was one of the men perched at the bar, laughing with friends, arm around his girl, tipping the waitress. 

Carefree was what they were. Sure they had problems, like how to get a promotion at work, raise their kid’s right and not cheat on their wives. But those weren’t problems. Those things seemed like a dream. 

He had no idea if she would come. No idea if she frequented bars, or socialized with her workmates. He actually knew very little about her, but he knew about the things that mattered. And he knew he had hurt her. He hadn’t wanted to, but then he would have gone through anything to achieve his outcome. No one was getting in his way.

After his family he knew the path he had to take. It was one of vengeance and would take him places he should not go. For the things he would have to do would turn him into a monster. Turn him into people like Alarcon. It would mean there really wasn’t much difference between them. But at the time he couldn’t see another way. He couldn’t go back to prosecuting drug dealers and corrupt cops because that added up to nothing. All that did was get his family executed. It was the right thing, but the right thing isn’t always the best thing. 

He knew his wife would not want him to do what he had done. She would be disappointed in him. ‘Tonto’ he could hear in his head every time he made it to a bed at night or the morning after carrying out his vengeance. 

He also knew this vengeance wasn’t for her or his daughter. They were in the ground and nothing would ever change or that or make any of it alright. He knew his wife would have wanted him to pursue justice through the courts. He tried that route after they were killed but it lead to nothing. A lower level in the cartel took the fall and was given 20 years. Everyone knew this but the courts aren’t free of corruption, like the police, so there was no real justice. The man who ordered the executions was untouchable. At least through the means of formal justice. But there were other ways to get to him.

But those means meant he had to become someone else, he had to bury the man he was before with his wife and daughter in order to get to Alarcon. And he did that so well that he’d become another man entirely. Almost.

He couldn’t escape the nightmares. No matter of burying himself deep enough would make those stop. They were of his wife, but more of his daughter. They varied from shaking him awake, to screaming. The worst he awoke from in tears. He could never get back to sleep after those.

Kate had left an impression on him the first time he met her, when she asked him if he was ok after jerking awake from a nightmare on the plane. Of course it could have just been her way, it likely was, the normal thing to do to check in on someone. But it mattered.

People that knew him and what had happened asked him if he was ok. But no one else, and Kate didn’t know what had happened. He lied in his response of course, though not entirely, part of him was ok and part of him never would be. 

He felt for her after that, knowing what they were involving her in, knowing that they were using her. But he couldn’t do anything about that at the time, wouldn’t allow conscience to cloud his objective.

He looked up from his beer towards the bar. More people had filled up the bar, ordering drinks and food and greeting each other. He was still in the shadows of the bar, but the longer he waited the shorter they became. 

His beer was nearly empty, he debated whether to order another or if this was a fruitless exercise. Deciding it wasn’t a waste of time he signaled the waitress for another. While waiting he used the facilities and left coins on the table for the drink.

Washing his hands he considered his reflection. As a lawyer he took pride in his appearance, not out of vanity but respect for his profession and his family, as his father taught him. He wore suits, often linen due to the Central American heat and cared for his clothes as his mother taught him. 

The reflection was not particularly kind. He was older and tired, or just tired perhaps which had a tendency to age. He shrugged. The path he’d taken wasn’t conducive to staying youthful and he wasn’t concerned about that. But it was strange to not really recognize yourself.

He slid back into the booth, beer ready for him. He scanned the bar for any newcomers, sipping on the beer, and his eyes settled on Kate.

Setting the beer down, he shifted back deeper into the fading shadows of the booth and regarded her.

She was laughing. 

He had never seen her laugh. He’d barely seen her smile. It struck him how alive she looked when she laughed. And how beautiful.

He’d recognized that on meeting her, that she was attractive. But he held it in restraint, saw it objectively rather than emotionally at the time.

But now it hit him wholly.

She appeared to be with fellow law enforcement judging by the way they held themselves. Three men were with her, two older and one slightly younger than Kate in appearance. 

She held each of them in her sway while they talked but didn’t appear to notice this. They almost fanned around her, and he wondered if she normally joined them for post work drinks or perhaps this was a rare occasion. Surely these men had wives or children to pay so close attention to?

The younger man was more than interested in Kate he could tell. When he talked to her he touched her arm or shoulder, but he noticed that Kate subtly shied away when he did this. He should know not to touch her or women without being invited to, but clearly didn’t.

It felt like he watched her for hours, but it was only another three beers later. During this time she never looked his way. He tried to decide if that was good or bad and settled on neither.

He hadn’t decided to approach her or how if he planned to. But regardless it wouldn’t be here.

Kate appeared for all to see as happy, but he wasn’t sure. When the men were talking she would look away from them and gave the impression that she wanted to run or to disappear. But then she would turn back to them and smile brightly. Too brightly he thought.

She made moves to leave and he could hear the men tell her not to go, not to leave them to each other. But she shrugged and patted them each before disappearing out the front door of the bar.

He sat contemplating seeing her for the first time in three years. He knew he wanted to see her again. But he didn’t know how that should happen given their last meeting. He needed to consider this further, and soberly.

Finishing his beer he slipped out the bar and over to his car in the parking lot. Fumbling with the keys in the door he knew he’d had too much to drive, too many beers waiting for her and then watching her. 

The door unlocked and he sat heavily in the driver’s seat, putting the key in the ignition to turn the radio on.

He felt her presence later than he would routinely, the beer blurring his instincts marginally. But he felt the cool steel at the back of his neck.

“Kate”, he stated calmly.

The backseat was still for a few beats, and dark as he couldn’t sight her in the rear-view mirror.

“Alejandro”, Kate replied equally calm.

Silence filled the car as they each waited.


	4. Bruce Springsteen

‘Who oh oh, blush  
Who oh oh, blush’  
\- Cathedrals, ‘Howling’

4.

Kate had never experienced a period of silence this long. 

Neither of them spoke, as Kate held the gun to the back of Alejandro’s neck until her arm was sore. He didn’t move, even infinitesimally. 

She knew she was going to be the one who blinked. She couldn’t beat him at this. He was trained specifically for this. He had the greater control, the staying power.

Plus she knew she wasn’t going to shoot him. She just wanted him to know she had got the upper hand this once. 

When she saw him in the bar her brain entered slow motion instantly while everything around her, except him, sped up and went flashing past her. Time seemed to literally speed up and slow down simultaneously.

He had gotten up to use the bathroom as she turned her head and something about his frame and gait as he appeared from the shadows had caught her eye. 

It was him, her brain told her. And she believed it immediately. 

Blood flooded her ears as it did when Matt told her he was dead. She couldn’t hear anything above the pumping even though she consciously knew there were dozens of conversations going on around her. She had just been part of one with her fellow officers. She turned to look at them and they seemed to be talking to her but she couldn’t focus. 

She glanced back towards the bathroom, and a few moments later he exited head down moving smoothly back towards the booth half hidden in shadows and disappeared from view. She dropped her head as he would have taken his seat and moved slowly back to look at her colleagues, her heart pounding.

She started laughing, and in a manner somewhat uncontrollably. Jim, Bob and Chad stared at her for a moment and then decided her laughing was entertaining and joined in.

She felt out of control, but the outburst of laughter got her senses back in check. The blood stilled and time fell back into place. She got control of herself and took a long drink of the beer in front of her to further still herself. 

It was all she could do to keep her eyes from the booth down the back of the bar. 

The guys talked to each other and to her. She responded absentmindedly but made a point of appearing bright eyed. But it was difficult to act normal when nothing was normal. 

Chad kept brushing her arm and touching her shoulder, even when she moved away slightly each time. He liked her, unrequited, but he wouldn’t if he knew her. He wouldn’t if he knew what woke her up at night. Not if he knew that she wanted things she should revile.

But Kate had never wanted things that would be good for her. Things that would be safe. 

Her brain was overloading with questions, thoughts and trying to hold a semi-normal conversation with her drinking partners. She had relaxed her drinking a little, not by much but her job kept her in check these days along with limiting when she could drink. She was smoking again though, but again had it under control. But now she wanted a cigarette so badly she would put Chad in an arm-hold if he touched her again. 

Standing up suddenly she made her goodbyes to the officers, dodged Chad’s attempt at a goodbye hug and darted quickly to the door. She knew they thought she was a little odd, so the next shift wouldn’t raise any questions of her behavior. 

‘Christ! Get it together!’ her brain screamed at her as she strode across the parking lot. There was no way he could have missed that erratic exit from the bar.

She reached the middle of the lot and turned half expecting to see him exiting the bar to chase her down. But nothing. No one has left the bar as far as she could tell.

Mentally calming herself she considered her next move. She didn’t know if he knew she had seen him, but had to assume he had. But he hadn’t come after her. He was probably considering whether this was the opportune time to approach her. She also realized that maybe he wasn’t going to approach her and that thought left her cold. 

‘He must have a car,’ she thought as she scanned the lot. Pulling out her phone she started checking licence plates. She’d come up with an excuse if she was questioned about it at work. A drunk that couldn’t remember which car was his or something. Not to drive of course, but sleep it off in the back.

There were twenty or so cars and she recognized all the owners except for two vehicles. There were two rentals, the first being a Mustang to an Eduardo Rodriguez and the second a Toyota to a Keith Martin. The second was the one.

Thankfully the car was an older model, nothing flashy and had a normal key. Checking around her for people she jimmied the lock, opened the back door and swiftly sat in the back behind the driver’s seat pulling the door quietly closed behind her. Re-locking the car she sat and wondered what the hell she was doing.

Her breathing was too loud and she worked to get it under control and silent as she waited. She almost got back out of the car but stopped and instead pulled her gun out and let it rest it on her thigh.

It was silent in the vehicle. But then she heard people making their way to a nearby car, she turned her head slightly and froze as she saw he was at the driver’s window scrabbling with his keys to open the door. 

Finally he got it open and sat in the driver seat. She knew immediately he wasn’t in a state to drive as she lifted her arm towards the drivers head rest. He was moving towards the radio and she twisted her hand to fit the gun through the gap and touch the back of his neck.

Even in his state she detected that he sensed the gun before it made contact with him. And he froze and continued to stay that way. 

Hearing him say her name sent a frisson through her, like his voice was a gun held at the back of her neck. It was solid and cool and like a gun it sent a jolt of fear through her, but that passed and left a feeling of not unpleasant disconcert. 

She sat that way for some time along with him, her arm aching but she refused to let it droop. 

She wished she could see him in the rear-view mirror, but the angle wasn’t right. She hadn’t caught a glimpse of his eyes since the balcony. She wondered if they would look on her any differently. Unlikely.

She was measured and polite when she finally spoke, “Alejandro, could you please step out of the vehicle and place your hands on the roof. I’m going to do the same and I’ll lower the gun when we are both outside and you’re in position and I’ve checked you’re not carrying.”

“Sure, Kate,” he responded smoothly seemingly sobered up during their silent non stare-off in the car.

‘How did he do that,’ she wondered not for the first time, ‘how did he appear in control when from all accounts she was supposed to be?’

They each moved slowly and exited the vehicle, Alejandro turning slowly and putting his hands on the roof and Kate gently lowered her gun but kept it trained on him, arm aching but refraining from rubbing her shoulder and showing her discomfort. He would surely capitalize on that if she did. 

She moved behind him, “Are you armed?”

“Not tonight, Kate,” he responded, “my gun is in the glove box in the car”.

“You should also know I’m not wearing a vest, so please restrain yourself from shooting me,” he continued before finishing so quietly she only just registered what he was saying, “no matter how much I may deserve it.”

“I still need to check,” Kate stated her voice holding even while a shake crept into her left hand, “please keep still.”

She swept her hand gently across his back and down the back of his legs, avoiding intimate areas, checking his ankles before standing and checking his arms.

“Please turn towards me and place your hands on your head while I check the front.”

He turned towards her and their eyes met, his flashing at her whilst his mouth was held in an indifferent line. He cast his eyes skywards as she checked his front and was then satisfied he was telling her the truth.

“You can relax now,” she murmured embarrassed even though she was within her rights to check him.

He gently dropped his arms to his sides and moved his eyes back to hers. 

“Did you enjoy that?” he probed, a clear glint in his eye.

“Sure, Alejandro,” Kate responded in kind.

She was determined to hold her own here, for as long as she could. 

He cocked his head at her, “So now what, Kate?”

“Get in the passenger side,” she ordered smoothly, “I’ll drive to mine”.

She knew he would know where she lived, he can’t have found her here and not known that. So if she wasn’t safe then she wasn’t safe in her home. She may as well have this out in the privacy of her home.

He nodded and swiftly moved around the car and slid into the seat. His hands didn’t go near the glove box but moved to flick on the radio. 

Bruce was singing of disguises as she took the driver’s seat and turned over the engine. 

Alejandro stared straight ahead as did Kate and she drove exiting the lot and headed towards her place.

‘I saw you last night  
Out on the edge of town  
I want to read your mind  
To know just what I've got in this new thing I've found  
So tell me what I see  
When I look in your eyes  
Is that you baby  
Or just a brilliant disguise.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I still own nothing. And very much appreciate the kudos.


	5. Drive me to Your Front Porch

‘Golden siren  
Under exposing  
Come lay your weakness down  
On the floor in the backseat’  
Cathedrals, ‘Howling’

5.

He thought she would be nervous, instead she was calm. She drove steadily, obeying the speed limit and indicating on the deserted streets. Actually, she was behaving by the book which he shouldn’t have been surprised at. 

He didn’t look at her, just looked out front at street lit silent streets and pondered what they were doing. The beer had faded and he considered the potential outcomes of the night.

One: Kate would pull into her driveway and shoot him in the car. A messy option that would only work if she had a silencer.

Two: Kate had contacted her DEA buddy to lie in wait at her place to take him out. But Mr Legal had seemed by the book so this was only a remote possibility.

Three: Kate would invite him in, offer him a coffee and then shoot him in the back of the head. Que sera sera.

Four: Something that didn’t involve his death. But the future's not ours to see.

Actually, he noted with a slight smile, he must be drunk as this isn’t his normal thought process. 

Suddenly, he saw they were at her place as Kate pulled into her drive. The chocolate box style was appealing but it didn’t fit with Kate. She’d seen things and living in such a house seemed naïve in some way. 

He’d driven by of course. Got the lay of her land in the last few days before going to the bar.

She got out and closed her door. He waited. So option one wasn’t the way he would exit the world.

After some time she re-opened the car door and leant in, “Are you getting out?”

He moved jerkily grasping for the door handle, finding it and exiting her car not very smoothly. He closed the door gently behind him and stood looking at Kate.

She locked the car and looked at him quizzically asking, “Are you drunk?”

He shook his head while responding, “No, just a few on an empty stomach.”

“I have food inside. You can sober up,” she replied moving towards the small front porch.

He didn’t follow though it seemed like an invite.

Reaching the door she turned back and had to ask him again to move, “Alejandro you can come inside.”

He moved again making it to steps when he heard a quiet, “No one’s lying in wait.”

So Reggie probably isn’t about to pounce with a knife when he steps through the door. Scratch option two.

Kate unlocked the door and stepped in flicking a light switch somewhere to the left of her. 

He stood on the porch.

She turned again, “Do I need to invite you in? Are you a vampire?”

He actually laughed at that, “I apologise Kate. But are you sure you want me to come inside?”

She looked at him evenly for a long moment.

“I’m undecided,” she started before falling silent then stating, “I’m not afraid of you”.

He was quiet watching her. Kate stating she wasn’t afraid of him broke something in a small way deep inside. There she was again reminding him of what he’d lost.

“I’ve thought a lot about everything,” she continued, “I think I understand….somewhat.”

He started surprised and tried to diplomatically gather his thoughts on that, “Kate… I don’t mean to disagree with you but you couldn’t… but I don’t understand.”

She was quiet and looked at the porch floor in front of him, and he wanted to take it back.

“Sorry,” she whispered, “I didn’t mean… I just… I had to make sense of it somehow.”

He nodded not knowing what to say as she lifted her eyes back to him.

“Come in?” she asked firmly. 

He moved towards her and walked through the doorway and gently closed the door behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had a long un-planned break from writing this. Wasn't sure where I was going once they met up again. I think the tone isn't quite in the spirit of Alejandro but I thought a short chapter would inspire me to carry on (we can all do with some British spirit at times).

**Author's Note:**

> I own nothing. 
> 
> Never done this before (more of a reader than writer) but there's something about Sicario and Kate and Alejandro that has stuck in my mind. I'll see where this goes. Howling is by Cathedrals.


End file.
